So all this week I have been filming short clips for my Sunday Vlog regarding my Mental Health State and this week has been a test because its been a Rollercoaster of a week which has been along time since this has happened but I know its all work related.
So this started Tuesday 6th Feb 2018 was a bad day one of them days I could not face any members of the public but thanks to the job I had to but felt physically sick when I did its a hard thing to explain but most of you reading this will know what I mean, it also felt like my mind was trapped behind 4 walls and could not concentrate at all.
Wednesday 7th Feb was a bit better but it seems like the mornings are ok but the afternoon was really bad, I kept myself to myself while at work by dusting the bric a brac which kept me away from most of the customers but it was not easy at all, I approached the staff but it was hard to explain why I felt this way because there was thousands of things going on in my mind I could not concentrate on one fully, bit like the game frogger standing by a motorway and waiting for a gap so I could run across but to much traffic, thats not what happened but how my mind felt.
Thursday 8th Feb was allot better starting to get my humour back and lots of nice customers in the shop so slowly sliding out of the mind set.
Friday 9th Feb was just the same as yesterday but knowing the weekend was upon me I was a little bit happier.
(today) Saturday 10th Feb the last day before my 2 days off, my mind set was completely different I seemed to have found confidence in allot of things today feels like the road is clear for now and feels like a door has appeared in the 4 walls i mentioned earlier, so was easier today to work even though I faced an irritating work colleague but delt with it confidently.
So basically my vlog tomorrow is chatting a little about what I just typed but you can see it in me I struggled, its not easy filming on a bad day mental wise because you dont want to show that side of you but felt it very important and more people should film the days when they are feeling so down because it can help in the future, Say you film one bad day and one very good day and upload and share then the other days you feel bad then just watch your very good day and it could help you, it does help me, then the bad day one someone out there could stumble on it and they could realise they are not the only one out there which helps allot, the main thing that has helped me is seeing other people with the same problems and knowing and sticking together we cant beat it but we can support each other.
please comment me if you have the same issues or just need someone to chat to, I am here weather its on YouTube or here I want to help the best I can, I am not a qualified doctor or counsellor but I can be there for you to chat to.
I will add the link to the vlog when it goes online after 6pm 10th February 2018 Sunday.